Anything You Can Do I Can Do Better!

[The following is transcribed from a tape recording I found in Geekcave after waking from a drug-induced sleep]
Stupid little boy, did you think I wouldn’t find your secret headquarters? For too long I have watched your male ramblings on this page. Too long have I been subjected by your testosterone influenced ranting. Well no more bucko! I. Me. Joni DeRouchie. Director. Writer. Web Goddess. All around amazing woman is running the show! Oh, no you don’t… No waking up yet… [Undecipherable mumbling followed by a loud THUMP. That would explain this bump on my head]. Heh, heh, heh, there we are silly little Geek, back to dreamland with you. Now then, where was I? Ah yes. Time for a REAL top-10 list of the HOTTEST Geeks EVER. Unlike you easily amused men, we ladies need more then green legs and robotic boobs to be impressed. And so, I present to your “fans” a TRUE Top-10 list. Damn, he’s coming around again! Time to depart… Oh, he has a Wesley Crusher action figure… Not anymore! [More crashing can be heard on the tape. I wake up to find some of my underwear missing and multiple calls to 900 numbers. Gonna’ get you for this Joni].

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The Punisher

This is what happens when you stray too far…

It would be too easy for me to spout off how much I hated The Punisher and everyone involved in this steaming pile. To be fair, Rebecca Romijn-Stamos (soon to be Rebecca Romijn-Duran, oh yea), is quite good. Granted her role is rather simple and one-dimensional (course, anyone who sees this craptasical film will totally get the irony of that statement). Still, the character of Joan is well performed and you genuinely feel sorry for her lot in life. With the exception of the utterly wasted Roy Schieder, all the other performances have been phoned in. Hell, Kevin Nash showed better acting skills in the squared circle. See, I’m doing what I promised I wouldn’t do. Well, let me get the review out of the way so I can get to the point.

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Better the Second Time Around

Ugh, it’s around 1:30 in the afternoon and I’ve only been up about 30 minutes. Anyone who knows me understands that this is a big deal. But, it was RPG time last night (and this morning) and so sleep was not attempted until a few hours ago. Plus, the friggen daylight saving times! Who can I blame for THAT idea… Great when you are a wee Geek wanting to ride bikes longer into the night, but not so much when you are a resting DM trying to stay out of the sun’s rays! As I look back at my previous ramblings I can see that EVERY second Sunday has a poor (and even non-existent) entry. Well, that will probably be the cast from now until eternity… Oh well, at least I acknowledge it. As I sit here and recover from last nights slaying I find myself looking at my movie collection and noticed that I have some films that many folks believe are brainless boring crap! As I looked at them through heavy eyelids I realized that I like these movies more with each new viewing…

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What’cha Gonna Do When They Come For You?

There is this great little fan film called Troops made by Kevin Rubio. It’s been available for many years now and I’m sure that the bulk of you have seen it. Well, at least those of you who scour the Internet for every little nugget of Star Wars love you can find. I KNOW you people; we can smell our own you know! Just in case you haven’t seen it, go…now…watch it…come back to my rambling later… What are you still doing here? GO! WATCH THE DAMN THING!

[Insert intermission music here]

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