Enterprises Real Player

Ask anyone who got the most tail on Star Trek and everyone will answer Captain James Tiberius Kirk. Okay, maybe a couple will name Spock, but that isn’t true and those people are confusing actual boot-knocking with their own lust. However, I, your friendly neighborhood Geek, is going to school you who the real Mack daddy of the Starship Enterprise was… The one, the only…

Dr. Leonard H. McCoy.


That’s right people. He ain’t nicknamed Bones cause of his profession. They should have nicknamed him Dr. Cajones, and not just cause of his effect on the ladies.

Let me explain…

Kirk got plenty of tail, but he had to work at it. Every planet he went, Kirk had to work the lovely ladies. McCoy simply talked, and not even to them. He could be explaining how some virus kills folks or telling Spock to kiss his human butt, but that simple southern droll made the ladies swoon.

Every planet or space station the Enterprise docked with, or went in orbit over Kirk got some sweet alien love. Very impressive. However, it never failed that McCoy had ALREADY had the lady. McCoy had that “Screw that Jimmy, I’ve friggen been there already” attitude.

Kirk was like that drunken frat boy that bragged to all his boys when he got a piece of Orion slave tale. McCoy? He just winked, grinned and walked away humming: “I’m a doctor, not a talker”. Kirk may have shone the ladies a good time, but they would come back to McCoy cause he would at least act like he respected them in the morning.

Even when ladies weren’t involved McCoy was the man with the stones. Take for instance the classic episode Space Seed. Khan is lying in bed, McCoy goes to check on him. Khan puts a scalpel to his neck. Does he whine? Does he beg for life? Does he even try to smack it down? No. He simply lowers his voice. Looks that superhuman in the eye. Swallows his fear and says, “well either choke me or slit my throat”. Khan pressed the blade harder. Does McCoy buckle? Does McCoy give in? Hell no! “Slicing the jugular will cause death the quickest, a little to the left”… Sure, Kirk would have survived too, but he wouldn’t have done it with any style.

Thankfully, I’m not the ONLY person who feels this way. The lovely Dax reinforced my belief in the great DS9 episode “Trials and Tribbulations”… When she looked at the good doctor…

“He had the hands of a surgeon”… Ah yea…

McCoy, you ?da man…